When I was a kid my mom used to buy album after album of Christian songs for us to sing and learn. She brought us up in a very Christian home and we weren’t allowed to listen to secular music. I never minded though at that age because I loved the albums we had and I have very vivid memories of my sisters and I dancing and singing all of those songs.

When I woke up Friday morning I began my day just like any other day. I made coffee, packed backpacks, and took Hannah to school. Livie and I are off work/school on Fridays and we spend our whole day running errands with family so like every other Friday, that’s what we did. We went to breakfast. We went to the post office, Target, the mall…and finally ended up back here at our house so my sister in law and I could watch Grey’s Anatomy. Such a simple, run of the mill day. Halfway through watching Grey’s, The Man texted me that there was a shooting at an elemetary school in Connecticut. I paused the TV right away to read what I could find online. I read from our local news station’s website out loud to my sister in law and we both sat there wondering how in the world this has not only happened again, but this time in an elementary school.

Later that night through tears I began to think about how those babies must have felt in their last moments when suddenly I remembered a song from one of the albums I loved as a kid. The title was “My Father’s Angels” and the chorus said:

They’re all above me

Beneath me

Before me

They’re all around me

My Father’s angels all protect me…everywhere

I imagined that right before these innocent babies took their last breaths, in the midst of the chaos and fear, they saw angels. Their angels. And these angels took them to Jesus.

I have/am currently struggling in my faith. I’ve been questioning a lot of things I learned growing up regarding being a Christian and what the Bible says versus what it really means. But this I am sure of and will never waiver on it- we all have guardian angels and the Bible says in many places how closely children’s angels stay to them. I know with all of my heart that angels brought these souls to Jesus and he is holding them all so closely now.

I can’t make sense of anything else that happened Friday. I have shed so many tears reading and watching the news and just thinking about these parents and families of the victims…and how it’s Christmas…and just everything. I am so emotional over it all.

I took this picture before I took Hannah to school Friday morning without knowing that I’d stare at it throughout the day ever so grateful that my babies were with me yet wondering how many of those parents of those babies took similar pictures before sending them to school that day.

Pray for the families. Pray for healing. I’m not sure of everything I’ve learned my whole life but I know God does listen to us, and he does provide comfort. Pray for comfort and healing for the families affected Friday.

I love them so much…even more after all of this, if that’s even possible to love them more than I already do.