Tooting my own horn
I rarely do this…brag on myself or ever really feel like I have anything TO brag about. But this week I do. This week I made it over the 25 pounds lost mark AND made it into the final 10 pounds I want to lose til I make my goal weight. I haven’t weighed this amount since maybe 2005? It’s been a long time. And really, I have spent over 6 months losing this weight. Slow and steady I guess, right? I am determined to keep it off because I NEVER want to do this again. Losing weight sucks. I mean, it’s awesome to see it come off and realize you’re actually doing it BUT being on a diet sucks. And while Weight Watchers isn’t necessarily a diet but a tool to teach you to eat proper portions and get you to a healthy weight…it’s still a diet in that I’m still VERY aware of what I put into my mouth all day and I have to add it all up and account for it all. Living like that isn’t very fun BUT when the pounds come off, it’s worth it.
I looked for pictures of me from about this time last year, give or take a couple months, to compare to where I am today.
When I found this picture, I shuddered to be honest. I know I don’t look obese or huge. I guess the main shock was that I had no idea that I was that big back then. That was 2 pants sizes bigger than where I am today. I remember when The Man took that picture of me I told him I was never going to show it to anyone because it wasn’t very flattering. A year ago, most of the pictures of me weren’t flattering and I hated them. That feeling of hating how you look…it’s awful. No matter if you’re 5 pounds overweight or 50. If you’re not happy with how you look, it weighs on your shoulders constantly.
This was Mother’s Day last year. I look at my legs and my arms and immediately frown. Like I said, I know I wasn’t gigantic but that was big for me especially when my whole life I was pretty average sized. And now today?
I can look at this picture and not shudder or frown. I’m not TOTALLY happy about it yet…I know I have some more work to do but I’ve accomplished a lot in the last 8 months and I’m still on a mission to finish what I started.
I hope none of you take this as me rubbing anything in or gloating. That’s not my intention. I posted back in June about how I was starting this journey and I thought it was time for an update on my success and also to continue to keep myself accountable…especially in the future.
So happy Friday y’all. Today is a good day for me and this weekend WILL be a good weekend. Hope yours is too!
Shred update
Just a quick post to update y’all on how The Shred is going for me.
I’m typing this with a mouth full of an Oreo covered in a brownie that a friend baked. Hence, why I need to Shred this month. If I’m going to be tempted with delicious desserts like this daily, I have to work out through it so I don’t gain 50 pounds this month.
So last night I finished day 7 and I weighed in this morning. Total weight loss this week was 2.5 lbs. So now I’m 1 pound away from what I was before I went to Ohio. See? Those 10 days set me back THIS much that now I’m having to bust my ass JUST to get back to where I was. This is why it does NOT pay off to binge eat for days and days. 1 day? Sure. You can make that up in the next 2 days. But every day for days is NOT ok. I can’t believe I used to eat like that always. Like that was just how I ate. Ate garbage and whatever I wanted every day. No wonder I’m in the situation that I’m in now. And losing weight does NOT get easier the older you get either. Just a little word to the wise there.
Next Shred update will be next week!
Back to Shredding
That’s right. I’m back on The Shred wagon. I realize that December is quite possibly the WORST month to Shred BUT then again, it’s the BEST one because this is the month I eat the most and completely blow any responsible eating habits. I don’t want that to happen this month. When I’m working out, I’m more liable to eat better which in turn will lessen the food binging. Plus, I have that last 10 to lose before New Year and dammit, I’m determined to get it off! I know it’ll be hard but I also know that I can do this. And so I started it last night. Jillian and I had a come to Jesus last night and I will say that although it was hard to get off my ass to do it and I’m sore today, I’m glad I did it. I felt good after it last night. I remember that I was sore the entire 30 days I did it last time BUT the results were awesome.
I haven’t worked out much since Shredding in June so I’m hoping this will get me back into a good routine. I love how I don’t work out for years, then work out for 30 days straight, and then go back to not working out at all. It helps that I Shred with a bunch of girls online and we all keep each other accountable. And after that month when it’s just me being accountable to myself? Pft. I blow it. Let’s hope that this time I don’t do that because exercising is so important and I need to stick with it.
Even if I want to punch that Jillian bitch in the face daily.
It helps though that this time I have a partner who does it with me at home.
It doesn’t seem like 4 months is a lot of time but in baby world, it is. The last time I Shredded, Livie whined that I wasn’t holding her or sat on the couch and watched me. Not this time though. This time she joined right in.
And after all of that, I let Hannah watch the video Santa made for her. You can go to portablenorthpole.tv and make these bad ass videos that are SUPER realistic with a REAL live Santa that says your kid’s name and other details that makes it super convincing. Hannah loved the one I made for her last year and this year they’ve improved it to add even more details. She watched it closely and when it was over she looked at me with tears streaming down her cheek and said “Can I watch it again?”. It was the sweetest thing she’s done in SO long and I realized that yes, my baby is growing up but she’s still a baby at times. And so sensitive and dramatic like her mama. Of course I let her watch it again and in her prayers last night she thanked God for the Santa video and told God to tell Santa she says thank you.
Needless to say, after Santa made sure to remind her to do well in school because he was watching, she did her homework with a smile on her face and a skip in her step. I can’t even tell you how excited I am for Christmas this year. To see my girls’ faces when they open their presents and realize they got everything they asked for. And more. Looking forward to the next few weeks and all it has in store for us, including Hannah’s 8th birthday party this weekend (a few weeks before her birthday) and the annual Christmas pictures we take with all the cousins that is sure to produce many laughs.
I can’t wait.
Weightloss road/Blood pressure pt 1
I know it’s been a while since I’ve updated y’all on my weight loss. I kind of suck because I’ve lost 19 pounds and I didn’t tell y’all! WTF is wrong with me?! It’s been a slow 19 lbs but losing slow is better and definitely best for me since I won’t gain it all back if I eat like crap for a weekend.
Which I do. EVERY SINGLE WEEKEND. I’m in a slump. I eat well all week and then pig out all weekend so I’ve been at 19 lbs lost for like almost a month now. And I’ve grown content because I’m down a size and ALMOST down 2 sizes…maybe 5 more lbs will give me that extra size? ANYWAY my point is that I need to get off my ass and start working out again and lose the last 11 pounds that I had set as a goal. It’s easy to get content when I’ve lost over 1/2 of what I wanted to and people tell me I look great and I look at pictures of myself then and now.
And since this is usually a photo kinda blog, I took it upon myself to embarass myself and post a picture of me from before I lost weight. I see this and I think man, you’ve done good Beck! And I also shake my head that I let myself go like that. I know that I wasn’t obese but I was far from what I wanted to be.
I wanted to look healthier…to BE healthier for me and my family. And here’s me now.
First thing I always noticed in old pictures of myself that I hated was my arms. I hated how fat they looked and how much they shook if I waved or danced. Not anymore!
My face is A LOT thinner.
I can wear tight shirts again! I would have never worn this shirt months ago.
Skinnier arms and skinnier face together in one pic. SCORE FOR ME!
But then I think about how much better I’ll feel in 11 more pounds…and how different I’ll look again in 11 more pounds. So I’m on a mission. I’m going to start working out again and eating better EVEN on the weekends when it’s the hardest. I lost 19 pounds so I damn sure know I can lose another 11.
On a side note, a big reason I needed to lose weight was to get my blood pressure under control. I went to the doctor 2 weeks ago and it was still majorly high. I know it has to be stress related as I’ve lost weight but my doctor insists on me seeing another doctor about this to get further anaylzed. Part of me feels like a failure. I’ve busted ass to get my weight under control hoping it’d get my blood pressure under control. No such luck. So now we have to figure out if it’s a stress thing or if it’s deeper…such as a hereditary since everyone in my dad’s family has high blood pressure. So I’ll keep you posted on that.
In the meantime, I’m back to kicking ass and taking names on this weight loss.
And then the clouds parted
Friday evening I went home with a completely bummed outlook on life. I was still thinking about my dad and even though I told myself that Dad wouldn’t want me to bum around or sulk, I just couldn’t shake it. So I did what I normally do when I feel that way. I took pictures of my girls. And it’s like they knew that their mama needed to be lifted up because everything they did was so cute and whenever I need to focus or redirect I just have to look through my lens. A different view on what’s already in front of me.
Livie has this tendency to get into EVERYTHING she’s not supposed to get into. Usually I’m chasing after her telling her no but that night I decided I’d get it documented to show her that she really was quite a little spazz.
Trying to steal the remote.
Trying to reach my purse
ALMOST getting my purse which by the way I only noticed while I was editing because my focus was on Hannah in HER own purse and then I saw Livie’s little hand on the bottom of the frame. Stinker.
And while I worked out Livie got super antsy and crabby and Hannah decided to step in and be a mama to her. So in the middle of my work out I just walked away and got a picture because I couldn’t let the moment go by.
So that was my Friday and by the end of the night I was feeling ok again. My girls, once again, healed me.
And since I mentioned working out, I will say that I’ve officially lost 15 pounds so far. I’m halfway to my goal weight and I feel great.
Saturday morning I woke up and forgot it was my birthday for about 5 minutes. We just laid in bed and talked to Livie and groaned that it was too early to be up like we do every Saturday. And like every other Saturday I grabbed my phone off the dresser and checked my email. I had 27 unread emails and I thought to myself “What the heck? How do I have that many unreads?” and once I opened up my email and saw they were all Facebook messages alerting me that my friends and family were leaving me birthday messages…that’s when I said out loud “Oh yeah! It’s my birthday!” I got over 50 happy birthday messages on Facebook and about 20 on Twitter. I can’t stress enough the good those did me. The Man worked all day Saturday and I ran errands and fought with the girls who didn’t want to behave AT ALL while we were in stores. It was hot and I was sweaty going in and out of places and I finally called The Man at work with an exhausted sigh and whined that my day went from fabulous to sucking. Then he said he was coming home in an hour and that perked me up. We had plans to go to dinner and a movie later on so I put my best face on and headed home from the parking lot of Target where I had a minor breakdown. And like the night before, I took picture because I needed a pick me up. And it worked.
Dinner was good. The movie, Inception, was great. And yesterday we slept in because the girls were gone and ran more errands and relaxed before our family pictures in the evening. Hannah wouldn’t let me get a picture of her all dressed up but the baby did, per usual.
I can’t wait to get these pictures back. Livie was a mess and did not cooperate at all and it was 95 degrees and my hair was huge and frizzy and we were sweaty BUT I still think they’re gonna be awesome. I can’t wait to see them. And on our way home from the session I was thankful that I had the opportunity to get the camera that I always wanted with the lens I always wanted to get good pictures of my girls on my own because there are times, like at that session, where Livie won’t smile and Hannah complains about the mosquitos while sweat is dripping down her nose. It’s then that I’m glad I get good shots at home because my baby girl usually is all smiles.
And all of this, everything I put up in this post, healed me. And I know that is something my dad would be happy about.
Back into our routine
Last night I finally got back into my routine. I got home from work, I worked out, ate dinner and took pictures of my baby.
Hannah was at her Nana’s again last night. I feel like I’ve barely seen her in the past week. She was with lots of family in Ohio and I maybe spoke to her once a day in the middle of running around. Then she gets home Tuesday and is off to Nana’s house by last night. It’s summer and she’s trying to live it up. I can’t blame her. So it was just me and Liv for a little bit last night until Hubs surprised us and came home early from work.
I’ve noticed the older she gets she more she acquires Hannah’s toys. In that picture she’s whining and holding up this little Star Wars computer game that she LOVES playing. It’s got worse detail than an Atari and yet she loves it.
She can’t open it on her own though so she’s constantly bringing it to me to open it while trying to keep her balance because it’s kind of heavy. I did try to get a picture of that but none of them were good. It’s super cute though to watch. I promise.
It’s been raining a lot down here lately which is not the norm. Usually summer here consists of temps over 95 everyday and crazy gulf coast humidity and the usual summer drought. No drought this year. It’s been raining for 9 days straight. I’m a bit annoyed at this point. Granted, we missed a lot of the rain enjoying the cool dry weather in Ohio last week but already, in the 4 days that I’ve been back I’ve: gotten rained on, gotten stuck in horrible traffic, and had to walk through a flooded tunnel of brown water to avoid walking in said rain. So needless to say, I’m done with all this rain. The ONLY good part of it is how green my grass is. Seriously, I mean that. Usually in the summer our grass has brown dry spots and it’s so hard to keep nice looking because the heat burns it up. Not this year. It’s so wet in fact that mushrooms are popping through and while I hate the thought of mushrooms in my food or near me, I thought they looked pretty cool in my yard.
When I walked out this morning there were about 5 more in the yard and they looked huge. It amazes me how fast they pop up and grow over night.
And so the new workout. Yes, it was started last night.
This was intense. It made doing The Shred seem like a piece of cake. I was begging for Jillian to come save me after just a few weeks ago I was cussing Jillian out. Now mind you, I liked this more. I like cardio and leg exercises because I have huge legs and need to get them under control. The Shred was circuit training and I’ve NEVER liked that kind of exercise even though it’s so effective. I think this new workout will be even awesomer. Yes, that’s a word (to me). I plan to do it 5 days a week and take off on the weekends. It has an ab burner, a thigh burner, a bun burner, an arm burner and some stretch workout. I will probably skip the stretching one for now and probably not do the arms as much either as my lower half is what needs the most attention. Last night I did the thigh work out. It had great moves to tone thighs and lots of cardio in between to do that ever famed raising and lowering the heartrate to burn the most calories. I’m excited to see how this changes me in another 30 days. I’ll give an update in 2 weeks and again when the month is over.
Tonight I plan to make Hannah let me take some pictures of her. I need some desperately. I miss her.
The 30 Day Shred and me
I started The 30 Day Shred 30 days ago on May 31. I decided that I needed a kick start to getting in shape and the only way I was going to do this was to shock myself into it. I hate working out. I really don’t like dieting either. But the older I get the worse my blood pressure is getting and the tighter my clothes are getting. Neither are ok with me. So me and a few friends decided that this is what we needed to do and if we all did it together we’d be accountable and more likely to finish. We were right. So many days I wanted to quit. I didn’t feel like going home after being gone 12 hours a day commuting and working to work out. But I did every single day.
And it has paid off.
I forgot to take measurements before I started this but I did weigh in before and after. I’ve lost 7 pounds this month and I know I’ve lost some inches. It might not seem like a lot but I’ve also toned up so I definitely look different. People are noticing that I’ve lost weight and the pants I tried to put on just a month ago fit. I feel so good about myself right now. I feel accomplished. I’ve never in my life worked out 7 days a week for a month. I played sports all through junior high and high school but we had weekends off then.
How does The Shred work? It’s circuit training. 3 minutes strength. 2 minutes cardio. 1 minute abs. It’s it’s 3 circuits of this. The whole workout is 18 minutes along with a 2 minute warm up and cool down. There are 3 levels of intensity. I spent 9 days on level 1, 11 days on level 2 and 10 days on level 3. You move up when you feel that you are ready. I can honestly say that I was not ready to move up to level 3 but I was so bored on level 2 that I moved up anyway. I woke up sore every day. It never went away. I think not having a break in between days was the culprit for that.
BUT it worked, y’all. I will say that if you don’t diet with this you won’t lose much. I didn’t diet the first 2 weeks I did this and I lost 1 whole pound. I was so discouraged. I decided to kick it up and diet the last 2 weeks…I counted calories and did weight watchers points along with it to really keep tabs of what I’m eating all day. I lost 3 lbs a week the second 2 weeks. I’ve never lost that much before in a week in my life and I totally say that it’s the combo of diet AND exercise. BUT if you decide you don’t need to lose weight but just wanna get in shape this is still for you. Like I said, I toned up big time. Even if I wouldn’t have dieted I would have seen leaner, toner muscles. My endurance level has grown too.
What’s next for me? Well I’m leaving tomorrow for vacation and I won’t be back til next week SO I’m fully intending to enjoy the break for those days. But on Monday I’ll be back on the wagon again. I plan to still watch what I eat when I’m gone to an extent to at least maintain the weight loss. I’ve already ordered another DVD to do when I get back. It’s a more cardio based workout which is what I need now to kick up the weight loss again and at least get another 7-10 pounds off. I won’t be doing that everyday. I plan on taking weekends off because doing The Shred on the weekends was tough. It’s the only days I have with the girls and Hubs without work getting in the way and we’re always super busy.
So I’m glad I did The Shred. I’m glad I stuck to it. Special thanks to Naomi and Lesley for keeping me accountable and doing this with me! I’m looking forward to starting back over next week and kicking ass again!
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And because no post is complete without pictures and I’ll be gone til Monday I leave you with these goodies from last year’s July 4th. It’s one of my favorite holidays and this year I’ll be flying while fireworks are going off all around the country. I’m bummed I won’t have pictures of it all this year but these were super cute from last year. See you in a few days!
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